Dear Average Woman

You missed to check the mirror again today to say to yourself that you are beautiful, no matter. I know it gives you chills because you refuse to believe it but we had a deal, remember? You owe kindness to yourself. Choose to say things that will uplift your soul. Choose to say it, repeatedly, until you are convinced of the truth. Listen: You are beautiful.

Stop carrying your Insecurity Baggage wherever you go. Turn down every thought of you not being good enough, not being smart enough, not being attractive enough. Can you stop picking up burdens of negative thoughts and pouring them down like wine, letting it fill your barrel with poison? Have you forgotten that you are made with an exceptional combination of fear and wonder? You are made worthy to and of love, of hope, of faith, of grace and of forgiveness. Sometimes, you forget these things and you dwell too much with all the lies inside your head. I am reminding you of this again: You are valuable.

Don’t get too shy around people. Don’t even think that you need to impress them and you always have to be perfect. Please don’t be too harsh on yourself, lower down your pride, tune off from your ego. You don’t need to be perfect, you just have to be yourself. Remember who you are when you’re with your closest friends, you are calm and you enjoy. Be open to the idea that people may or may not like you, you don’t have to feel bad if they don’t, it’s not the end of the world. Some people may not like you but you can always love them back, anyways. Try to express your you more: You are allowed to be who you are — flaws and all.

Put an end in selling yourself short, because you know what, you can do a lot of things…excellently! And I mean it in every sense of the word. Being good at art, or advocacy, or science, or words, or food, or cars, or wherever field you choose to be is never petty. You’ve got a plethora of passion and potential in your hands. You have been given an overflow of gifts that you can always work on. Be a good steward of your talents.

You, Average Woman, does not – at all – exist. There’s never a woman who is only Average. You’re a Woman. You don’t wear a label of range and measures. Stop living in the standards of this world because it will never fit you — you exceed it. You woman, you ought to love yourself, because hey, I’ll never get tired of stressing what’s obvious: You matter.

And please, don’t you forget.

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This post is inspired by this video (thanks Kamille for sharing this <3) and what had transpired today. Cheers!

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Just Keep Swimming Through

Never had I been in any relationship in my twenty-one years here on Earth and I don’t know when would I be in one. I’m a firm believer that the best is yet to come and my only chance at it is when I learned to wait patiently. However, every time a very dear friend of mine experience heart break, I always always wanted to comfort them the best that I can especially if in that moment, I won’t be by their side to hug them tight (to give them cookies and siomai) and narrate to them the eternal lists of how beautiful they are as a person.

To the girl who always had the greatest potential:

You texted me last night to tell me that you are in the core of a break-up; your long year relationship has finally ended. I want to let you know that I am sorry. I want to tell you that everything will be fine and everything will come into passing – that the time will come when you can finally run again and eventually you will fly, you can fly. You were always meant to fly.

I know, people will probably laugh at me – and I too, sometimes, find myself funny – when I give love advice when I, for one, never experienced and felt the same way that you did. But I hope you’ll hear me out, even so.

I know a lot of things don’t make sense right now – your heart is beaten and bruised from the whole course of your fight for love. It has been a tough ride. You have conquered the waves, you took courage to sail against the current. You had been very brave. You believe in this love sincerely that you had willingly given yourself  in the deep blue of the ocean where most of us won’t even dare to swim through. You were gasping for breath each time, you didn’t care if your legs are tired from swimming; the jellyfish may sting you but you just know in your heart that going to the bottom of it will prove to yourself that what you felt and where you are in is because of love.

I don’t blame you because of your choices. And I don’t think that this will be a wasted time, let alone, a wasted story. I’ve seen in it in you. You have this vast ability to care and to love. You are a story – and a very beautiful one at that. You are waiting to unfold. So, you need all these – the pain, the doubt, the tears, the weak knees, the lost appetite, the fear, the consequences, the feeling of emptiness. You need to feel that you are broken. You need to feel this hollow at this very moment. This might be the hardest days in the world for you, but you have to go through this like the way you did being at the bottom of the ocean: just keep swimming through.

While you are struggling to go back from the way it was, I hope that you will stop. Stop thinking that you can return, that you can do it all over again if the relationship will be given another chance, that maybe you are just running away from a bad dream. Let me tell it to you frankly, my love:

It’s over. Nobody’s coming back. Nobody’s expecting you to return. This is the end of the road for that relationship. It is finished. You are now free.

You have to keep living. You have to make your way up, the sun has always shine its rays in the surface of the water. Follow that light. Paddle at your own pace and do yourself a favor of not looking back. You have to rise from the depths of the blue; it might be a long long way to finally breathe the air from the dock of the bay, but you’ll be there soon should you choose it to be.

If you clear out all that space in your mind that you’re using right now to obsess about this person, you’ll have a vacuum there, an open spot – a doorway. And guess what the universe will do with that doorway? It will rush in – God will rush in – and fill you with more love than you ever dreamed. So stop using that person to block that door. Let it go.

– Eat. Pray. Love.

Remember, the only mistakes we can have in life are the ones that we didn’t choose to make right.

Love will come again. As long as we live, we will love. Someone will come and accept everything that we are, everything we have become and everything we will be. Just believe and pray that when the time comes, you are fully restored and healed. I know you will be, and I’m excited to see all of it. Did you know that in order for the caterpillar to become a butterfly, it needs to let go of its head? Gross idea, but, sometimes what we most treasure is the very same thing that we have to fully surrender in order for us to achieve our full metamorphosis. The caterpillar will never become a beautiful butterfly when it will just keep its head forever. It goes the same way with us humans, we cannot take hold of what’s best until we learn to let go of what’s good. Always easier said than done, but believe that God will help you surrender.

You are beautiful. True love will always see you as beautiful. And I hope you can give it to yourself – that love – and believe that in the midst of all these, you are still beautiful, you will be beautiful. Learn to find yourself again. Learn to forgive yourself. The beauty of being broken is the very miracle that someday, in God’s most perfect timing, you will be whole again.

God loves you, my dear. You are a gift from God to all of us and we love you. I can’t wait for the time when I can see your full bloom out of this brokenness.

When the past has passed from you at last, let go. Then climb down and begin the rest of your life. With great joy. 

– Eat. Pray. Love.

It Just Gets You

Growing up, never did I feel that I’m the prettiest girl in class nor I’m the beautiful princess at home. I never believe that I’m or will ever be attractive at all *coz I’m really not*. And that’s probably the biggest insecurity I’ll ever have. I’m telling you, it s*c*s sometimes. 

My mother is not the typical mother any child would have–the type that would tell his/her child he/she is handsome or beautiful, she’s not like that. I think she too is not convinced that I’m *at the very least* pretty, even. Yeah. What a support team?! Haha. But I wanna believe that she’s just not too vocal about how gorgeous I am and so. Haha. Kidding. 

Other people tell me that I need to learn how to take care of myself now, coz I’m not getting any younger. That I need to fix my hair, buy this-and-that for my face and do this for my body. There are others who just simply say that I don’t look good or I look old or I don’t look my age.  All those kinds of advices, and yes, even unpleasant thoughts. You see, my language of love is Words–hence, for me talking with grace is a major plus point. You can tell me I’m ugly and all that, but, sandwich it with some positive attributes so it won’t hurt that much. However, one cannot expect to receive that kind of treatment for always; there will be people who are very straightforward–forgetting grace and all and you just have to deal with it. 

The world has it’s own ways of defining what beauty is and definitely I don’t fit into it’s standards. We all feel that every once in a while. I’m just ever grateful though because I don’t belong to the world. I belong to the King of Kings; I’m a Royalty; I’m a Princess. Saying this, it boosts my confidence up 100times a notch. Although, being tempted and going back to my insecurities is always there. Like now. Some people can simply talk and discourage you in the process. When this happens and it happens every time, you’ll always have two choices: let them win and bring you down or let them realize that they won’t bring you down. It’ s a struggle to go over the latter coz it’s easier to throw out a Pity Party than being one Miss Bulletproof.

Actually, one can’t really face those giant monsters in their closets alone. That’s where the royal bloodlines come in. I can never do it alone–put a face in my insecurities and letting them all go and don’t affect me. Praise God, I have Him with me always. Even I got this major struggle with Beauty–funny, but yes I do, He always assures me that I’m more than what the world thinks I am. He thought of me as precious and sacrifice-worthy. He loves me. Even I burp like an ogre or I look like one. He’s just amazing. AWESOME!

I don’t give up on being one pretty girl. I know at the right time, I will be, but not because I followed the ways of the world. But my beauty shines inside out–the beauty of loving and serving my Big Daddy. I wanna achieve that first, for then, physical beauty will follow. Oh yeah!

So with this, a quick shoutout I give to my God’s Best: wherever you are and if you can even read this, I’m still a work in progress. I’ll do my very best to be the Someone God wants me to be for I know you’re doing the same too. I’m excited to meet you but I pray that when we do, you’ll see my efforts as I’m gonna see yours. Let’s do this for the glory of the King. :) orayt!

Live high. Live mighty. Live righteously. Cheers!