And Seeing a Rainbow Could Mean Believing that a Clearer Weather will Come After

I was supposed to give a testimonial today to a group of young people down South but, a few weeks ago, I was told of the changes that had to happen. I was taken off the list – nothing personal – because they had to invite a main sharer instead. The theme of the event was about Love and Waiting and my supposed part would be sharing my path in this whole waiting process.

And so, here’s what I would probably share to those kids (read: teens) if I were able to speak to them:

Waiting is never going to be easy. You all know this. Srsly, who likes to wait? We all belong to a generation of impatient humans.

When I was about eleven years old, a freshman high school who thought that my crush has a crush on me, I asked my mom this question: Ma, pwede na ba ako magboyfriend? And to my overly excited hormones, she replied silence. She did not say anything. She just kept quiet. And my young mind did not understand then that probably my mom was praying to the God of Heavens to pacify her daughter who got uncontrollable emotions that could possibly lead to teenage pregnancy, haha.

For me, there’s nothing wrong with the boyfriend-girlfriend thing even at a young age, guaranteed you are guided by your parents, you are obedient to your parents’ guidance, you got solid foundation and you know your limits. I don’t see anything wrong but it’s gonna be a tug of discipline between your parents and your wild heart. If you are prepared to go through some difficult battles at a young strength, then, go. Remember though, the consequences could be a lot tougher if you’re going to be really stubborn in the middle of your journey. I’ve seen few people who succeed in this and I’ve seen a lot who did not. Your choice.

By God’s grace, the younger me managed to graduate high school without having a boyfriend because I don’t know if I could ever resist the temptation of the world if I got what I wanted that early.

I never had a boyfriend in high school and until now but I got crushes. Crushes are life source, promise. They get you to school early because you wanted to pass by that corridor and get your daily dose of “inspiration.” That’s it, that’s their benefit, at least you’re not late.

Having crushes are normal, however, if you will purposely not study so you will stay in the same section as to where your crush is, that is crazy. Kid, you are young and crazy and wasting your opportunity to get more knowledge in your history class. You have to pause and recalibrate your mind. You think staying in the same section can get your crush to have a crush on you? It will never happen. But even if it does happen, it doesn’t change the fact that you’re missing out Nebuchadnezzar in History and it’s actual connection to the story you just read in the Bible.

Do not hurry. High school is just high school, there could be a lot more boys who you could fall in love with in College. Unless you’re in MassCom where statistics could be very well out of proportion. Haha kidding! Your goal shouldn’t be finding love, your goal should be waiting for love to come. And while at it, being the best that you can be. Find your purpose and fulfill it. Go change the world if you think the world needs changing. Or, go change yourself instead. In the meantime, please do good in school. You owe that to God, to yourself, to your hardworking folks, and to your country (yup, your country, the main reason why you memorized Panatang Makabayan).

Time will come when you’ll turn 20-something’s and you’ll now realize that how come everyone got their fair share of another person’s hands, arms and comfort and you – well – you are still you. You don’t have anybody to share that overflowing love in your heart with yet. Yes, you got your family and friends who reciprocate the love, but no someone yet. That different feeling. You don’t have that yet.

You know how it would be totally fine if every now and then, there’s another soul who would tell you that they admire you and would just do things for you and would ask you if you could risk loving them too? Then that makes you single by choice. But what if there’s none? You are just single by default. How does that make you feel? Sometimes you just wanna give up waiting and just wallow into self-pity questioning your worth. You just wanted love anyway, was it too hard to ask for?

There’ll be days when Doubts will come rushing in like tidal waves, pushing all your Brave offshore and far away. When it comes, carry your sunbeams with you, still. You’ve collected one too many along the way. You needed that when everything’s just too clouded and seeing a rainbow could mean believing that a clearer weather will come after.

You know how they say everything’s gonna be worth it in the end? I think they’re not lying.

Love will come when you’re brave enough to wait. Waiting is quite a process. It builds your stomach the abdomen it takes to never settle. We might get a six-pack after all these. And that, kid, is worth the wait.

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You is kind. You is smart. You is important. You is brave.

I watched the movie The Help over the weekends, and I must say, the story is a story of Courage.

Courage has always been a beautiful word for me. It’s like a secret chant you say to yourself which instantly delivers a wonderful amount of bravery and confidence. When uncertainty lingers at the porch of your mind, trying to quaff every single barrel of your sunshine, Courage will make you believe that there’s nothing wrong being in the dark for a while. Courage trusts that you’ll find the light. That’s what Courage does, it makes you Hope. And Hope shares the same attributes of Courage: beautiful. (I abuse the word beautiful so much, but, there’s no other way I can describe these two.)

The movie was set in a far away past where racial discrimination was still eminent in the United States of America – the Blacks serve as helpers in White people’s residences. However, their rights has always been disregarded. It makes me feel lighter, though, when I saw that not all White people are prejudiced; take Skeeter, a journalist who pushed for the Helpers to share their side of story with their service at the White people’s houses. Although, all her efforts might have been for naught if not for the willingness of Abiliene to support.

Skeeter and Abiliene were the two lead persons in the movie who took a stand and choose – what many people in their time, won’t – Courage. What’s very crucial about Courage is that it has to be chosen. You have to choose to be courageous. Nobody else can do it for you.

Despite the fact that Skeeter and Abiliene (together with the other Helpers) could be in grave danger, they still do what they had to do: act against racism and seek equality between the Colored and the Whites. They started a revolution, a spark for change. And I believe, they contributed a big part in the freedom of all cultures and races America is experiencing today. Imagine if they didn’t do anything when the very circumstance they’re in is asking them to make a stand? We, humans, most times don’t act out when we need to; afraid of so many things that would expose us in possible danger. Courage, often requires sacrifice – of our own time, money, talent, and even comfort – for the greater good. We have it all inside of us, we have the capacity to be brave, we have been given the ability to serve. It’s just that, sometimes, we tend to forget.

Yes, you is (also) brave.

When things go way out of hand and you tremble to your knees as you are shaken to the core, hold hands with Courage, do not let go. When every single molecule of your being wants you to run away and escape the grind of tomorrow, behold Courage in the eye, as long as his eyes flicker, don’t lose hope. When there’s too much fear in your heart and you can’t keep the tears anymore, look up, Courage is always looking down.

To have Courage is not to rely on your own strength. To have Courage is to surrender all your weaknesses in the hands of an Almighty God, entrusting every small portions of your life into His bigger plans for your future – be prepared to witness His power working in you. To have Courage is not to be free from fear, Fear is a healthy friend. To have Courage is bringing Fear with you in skydiving; no matter the struggle, it will remind you that you have wings – you are meant to fly. To have Courage is not to go through life easy. To have Courage is to embrace life in all of its uncertainties.

Show me how big your Brave is.

Twenty Seconds of Insane Courage

Life is all about surprises.

One day, you’ll be out going to your very first school day as a four year old in Nursery class. You’ll feel terrified as you hoped that your mom didn’t have to leave you there alone. And so, at a young age, you choose to stand and participate – together with the other kids – as you try to understand each new lesson. At a young age, this world is asking you to be brave.

Since school took most part in your growing up years, you know that acting the way you did in Grade School won’t get too much appreciated in High School. You got to make decisions on what to do when a member of your group didn’t show up at the day you are assigned to report something about History. You got to face new classmates who, sometimes, don’t care of what you feel just as long as they can make fun out of your expense. You got to be exposed in digging your thoughts deeper as you know you got to suggest something for a Science project. You invest in friendships that you didn’t know will last even after so many years, close to a decade. You know life a little better now, you know you had to be independent and make sound choices, you know you have to be brave.

College came and it’s a much different atmosphere. You are free to do what you like in the University, there’s a certain degree of freedom. And you are convinced with your entire life that this is the most wonderful experience of being in an academe. You choose who you are here and what you wanna be. You got to join new cliques and enjoy the time of being together in the afternoons when the professor didn’t arrive for the last session of your Tuesday class. There will be times that your principles and standards will be tested, there will be times that you’ll get disappointed by the decisions you’ve made. You struggle so hard not to make any mistakes, which in the end, you’ll come to realize that those mistakes were necessary. To sum up this stage of your life, and what you have done in between them, it goes to show that you chose to be brave.

You know you got this certain braveness in your heart after everything you had been through your teenage years, you know you could have anything under control, you truly believe so until the Real World came throwing real problems to your face and you got nowhere to go.

Then, it suddenly happened, Fear came in insurmountable amounts that your Brave can’t hold it. You struggle for air, you can’t breathe, you just can’t calm yourself down. And then Life crushed your spirit, you feel lost in a world you thought you’ve known all your life, you just float in a limbo – confused, dishearten, bewildered. You became afraid of failure, you don’t want to commit mistakes anymore, you shield your way in the opportunities that come along, you just want to be in your comfort zone.

I know how hard it is to live this life keeping your cool. And it will always always be threatening to venture out on new things you don’t know doing. But I’ve come to understand that you don’t grow up when you don’t learn; most of life’s lessons are learned best when you fail. It takes courage that in the midst of failure, you’ve got a heart that just wanna keep on moving forward, a heart that just wanna keep on trying.

For the past six months, I’ve been trying my best to live my life, I am trying to be more brave and open to what it will offer along the way and as to what I want to get to experience doing myself. It’s never easy, but I figured, that I don’t want fear to take hold of me from doing things that I know will help me flourish as a person. What got me along is this twenty seconds of insane courage I learned from Mr. Benjamin Mee of We Bought a Zoo (I wrote about that movie here).

Twenty seconds of insane courage is basically courage with some urgency. I mean, you don’t linger too much if you’re gonna do this and that and think of everything that could happen and those that could not. Sometimes, you take too much time until Fear walks in and just shut down your fuse, shut down your light.

When you know you got to do something…

-a dramatic eight inches haircut
-joining a free camp where you can hone your new found love in some sport
-telling your boss your plans in life that might differ from where your organization is leading to now
-going in for a ride which terrifies you in so many ways
-meeting old friends back from Grade School and High School
-chasing your dreams even if it meant being vulnerable to failure… Etc… Etc.

As the old Nike saying goes: just do it.

Do it when you got the courage for the first twenty seconds. Don’t hold back. Let go. Let go of all the worries of mistakes and failure, let go of the control you impose on yourself, let go and just breathe. Believe in Hope that your Brave will help you fly. I know sometimes it gets crazy, but if you could remember the time when you were four, you’ve conquered – you’ve delivered courage. You decided to take a leap of faith at such a young age, you delivered despite the fear, you felt invincible.

You only need twenty seconds of insane courage, a childlike faith, and I promise you something great will come out of it.

Life is full of uncertainties, be brave anyway. (Jeff Goins)